My day started with a phone call with a dear friend, just catching up on each other's lives. As I begin my drive, my view is the play of the snowcap mountains playing with the skies. What a delight!
I get to the visitor center of Taos, and before anything else, I need to write and let my feelings and emotions out because what happened an hour ago is still shaking me.
At one point, I hit a construction area. There is only one lane, and a car is in front of me. I kept my distance, but then I see in my rearview a van. It was obvious a drunk person was driving. It makes me very nervous, and my stomach has a massive knot. He is driving so recklessly that he is speeding and getting so close to me that I clearly see his face. I have nowhere to escape. I feel so trapped! I don't want to drive faster and get too close to the car in front of me. The last thing I want is to take down someone with me if anything is going to happen here. Finally, both cars take an exit. I am so tired, pissed off, and angry from other people's selfish choices affecting my life.
Even though my experience rattles me, I feel the mountains are hugging me with comfort and help me to calm down. It's funny how it feels like they are covered with vanilla ice cream with chocolate chip mint sprinkles on them. I can feel the pressure in my ears and the temperature going down as I'm climbing in elevations.
When I entered the visitor center, I am full of disappointment. I had yet to learn how that happened; I know I double-checked when I could visit the Taos Pablos. Well… it doesn't matter how, the Taos Pablos is closed for today. I will have to rethink my plans. The lady at the visitor center offers me other attractions to see, so I take her advice. My first stop is Ranchos De Taos Church.
I come to enter the Ranchos De Taos Church when the door opens, and an older man comes out crying. I couldn't just go in and ignore his pain. So I comforted him and let him tell me about his girlfriend that passed away from cancer. His pain let my own grief fold into me. I still miss my mom even though it has been 37 years since I lost her. I let my tears help me grieve. Grieving is a painful emotion that I wish we do not have experience. I enter the church, and it takes my eyes a while to adjust to the dim light. I'm the only one here. When I get closer to the altar, I'm struck by the beauty in front of me. I sit down for a while, observing the history of this place—this beautiful church gifting me with a spiritual feeling of love and hope.
I am heading to Taos Plaza, I walk for about 10 minutes, but I feel trapped in my own emotions. I need fresh air, so I head to Rio Grande Gorge Bridge for a bit. It's too icy to try and hike around, so I decided to head back to Santa Fe with one more stop to visit Santuario De Chimayo Church. I chose a different route from how I came. I needed to change my energy, so I took Rt 518 to 76. That turns out to be "The High Road Scenic Byway".
Oh wow! I feel like I am in Vermont, driving to Mount Snow and not in New Mexico. My view is of blue skies, pine trees, and snow-covered mountains. The sun shining on the white snow makes the day even brighter. I'm very fortunate that nature has a healing effect on me. I am very grateful for that.
I think I will change my route on my way to Boulder, and stop at Taos Pablos. I may still have a chance to see it.
The day left me fragile. Today's events set heavy on my heart for a while, bringing back pain and trauma to the surface. It is nice to know tomorrow is a new day with a new beginning.